Q: We're in tourism/hospitality and gearing up for our busy season. Before we get there, I'd like to have a meeting with all the direct reports to go over policy issues, answer questions and blow off a little steam.

We have three people who were all hired at the same time and trained together but have shown remarkably different ability levels and talents. This has resulted in one member of this group receiving advanced responsibilities early on, as she is more than capable of handling them. I have heard through the grapevine that other staff members are feeling a little put out by her newfound authority (although, from what I hear, everyone really enjoys working with her). I don't know how much of this is related to her age (she is significantly younger than the rest of the staff) and how much of it has to do with the fact that she simply caught on faster than the rest of the staff.

Would it be advisable to discuss with everyone at the meeting that they've all progressed differently and so received different responsibilities, but stress that we are all a team working toward the same goals? I'm tempted to leave well enough alone, but am preparing to go on maternity leave and don't want to leave a great big mess that may explode once I'm gone.

A: I wouldn't do it at a group meeting because it risks coming across as condescending and making everyone feel awkward, including your staff member who's taking on the additional responsibility. You'd probably be better off simply taking on the grumblings directly with people one-on-one when you hear them. (And keep an eye on those people; those sorts of grumblings are rarely heard from high performers.)

Going forward, though, you can sometimes ward this off before it starts by explaining why you're giving someone increased responsibilities at the time that you first announce it. For example, “Because Jane has done a fantastic job at XYZ and learned it faster than we've ever thought possible, I'm asking her to manage all XYZ training from now on.”

Q: I have a question about tolerating rudeness. I manage a team of about 14 people, three of whom are assistants. My issue is that one of my assistants is being very mean to another (she is very nice to the third assistant, as well as to everyone else), and I am not sure how, or if, I should handle it. The mean assistant will giggle and roll her eyes in a meeting after her counterpart says something (sometimes silly questions but she is clearly junior and still learning), will ask her personal questions in a disdainful tone and is just generally not inclusive or nice to her. The non-mean assistant is generally a good worker and good at her job, very eager and well-liked by members of other teams. She has not said anything to me about her mean counterpart and it seems to kind of roll off her back. As supervisor though, I hate to condone such outright meanness when it is done in front of me.

What are your thoughts? Should I make sure it's mentioned in her review? I feel like it shouldn't be tolerated but am conflicted because it is affecting no one's work.

A: Yes, you should absolutely say something to her and don't wait for her review. You should be giving her feedback all along, and this is absolutely an appropriate topic for you to talk to her about. Tell her that she needs to be pleasant and professional to everyone she works with, that it's not acceptable to roll her eyes at co-workers or otherwise be rude to them, and that you expect her to immediately begin treating the other assistant pleasantly. If you notice any more of it continuing after that, have a more serious conversation with her, as you would for any performance issue that isn't getting resolved.

It's not just about whether something is affecting the work; it's that she needs to act in accordance with the culture and values that you want reflected on your team, and that includes not making it an unpleasant environment for someone else.

Q: I work for a very small office, but recently our workload has increased enough to warrant an additional hire. This person is supposed to spend half the time helping another department and half the time helping my department. This person has never received any training for our department, and I'm noticing daily mistakes. I spoke to my boss about his errors and explained that I thought our department could benefit from some additional rules and oversight so as not to single him out, but rather get all of us on the same page. She agreed but nothing has changed. She has yet to have a sit-down conversation with him and explain our processes and rules.

I fully believe this situation could be corrected with proper training and oversight from our boss, but I'm hesitating because it may cause issues. I'm just not sure what the right plan of action is to stop this from getting worse.

A: It sounds as though the issue is that you weren't direct enough with your boss. Go back to her and be very clear this time. Tell her that you're noticing daily errors from your new co-worker and give some examples. Say that you wanted to alert her so that she knows what's going on and can decide whether he needs more training, more oversight or something else.

This isn't accusing your boss of not doing her job. It's simply giving her relevant information that affects your team.

Want to submit a question about an issue in your office? Send it to alison@askamanager.org.