Singer Sinead O’Connor emotionally pleaded for help from her family and opened up about her mental illness in a rambling Facebook video posted from a New Jersey motel she had been living in. The 50-year-old Irish singer says in the video posted last week that she is staying alive for the sake of others, like her psychiatrist, and if it were up to her, she’d “be gone.”

“I’m fighting, fighting, fighting, fighting — like all the millions and millions that I know I’m one of — to stay alive every day,” she said in the video.

O’Connor lamented what she described as a lack of support from loved ones and asked her adult children and their fathers to make an effort to bring her home to Ireland.

O’Connor said she was living in a New Jersey Travelodge, and she later posted the address of a Travelodge in South Hackensack.

South Hackensack police Capt. Robert Kaiser said Tuesday that officers conducted a welfare check, but O’Connor wasn’t in her room at the time. He said she is no longer staying there, and police don’t know where she is living. An email sent to her agent wasn’t immediately returned.

A follow-up Facebook post on O’Connor’s page late Monday, said to be made on the singer’s behalf, said the singer is safe and not suicidal.

“She is surrounded by love and receiving the best of care,” the post read.

O’Connor has been open about her mental health problems over the years and previously said she was diagnosed with bipolar disorder.

— Associated Press